"Well Jesus Christ I’m not scared to die, I’m
a little bit scared of what comes after. Do I get the gold chariot? Do I float
through the ceiling? Do I divide and
fall apart?
'Cause
my bright is too slight to hold back all my dark
And
the ship went down in sight of land
And
at the gates does Thomas ask to see my hands"
(sorry for such a long quote)
I try to question everything. That’s why I don’t believe in God. God
is absolute. The end all, be all. If we all of humanity had no questions then we would never get any answers (or inventions, or technology, or any innovation what so ever). I am afraid of what happens to me when I die but I’m not afraid enough
to accept any answer that might ease my mind. In fact, I would rather believe
this is the only life you get because it would bring about a better
appreciation of everything. If you know your time is limited, one tries to be the best they can be, to see all they can and basically get as much as they can out of this crazy, organized, random, chaos, of semi-linked events.
I can relate anything back to a video game or movie -I’d like to think it
is a hidden talent of mine- but It is just like in the game Mass Effect, the Asari race lives
for centuries and they are still kids in a sense when they are under 100
years old or so. They see us as sort of bullies in the universe, we run around and
get what we want, but it is because we need to get things done in a short time. As a singular person, we don’t have very long to live so we have a crazy ambition that
other races do not posses/need. They have eons to get their problems solved.
Even in
the movie Troy, there was a quote that stuck with me:
“I'll
tell you a secret, something they don't teach you in your temple. The gods envy
us. They envy us because we're mortal, because any moment might be our last.
Everything is more beautiful because
we're doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now, and we will never be
here again.”
That is probably one of the most beautiful arrangement of words that
I had heard up until that point in my life, and it doesn’t hurt that Brad Pitt
spoke them ;)
I like to think on my darkest day- I can still see the beauty around me. But so much of our lives is our perception, to me this means delusion. I think of the divine as true understanding- we can see past our constructed realities that blind us to each other and ourselves. I am working on peeling away the layers-but I also love these layers. I think I am more afraid of change than death. I like your idea about appreciating this life- words to live by for sure- thanks for the post.
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